The Ride
Do you know where you're going to? I asked myself this, and I honestly did not know the answer. My life has veered in several different directions over the years. There is a side to me that's very disciplined and ambitious; yet there is also another side that's free-spirited and spontaneous. It's funny how some of the things driven by my instinctive desires will eventually require my cultured skills in order to nurture them. And it's also interesting how nature has embedded into us instincts so powerful that we are driven to great extents just to follow them, sometimes regardless of the consequences.
The last few days have been volatile. Sun and rain have alternated, almost in tune with the battle between turmoil and peace in my life. I've realized that as one gets older, he becomes fragmented into more and more pieces. It makes one wonder if identity is known to only specific entities that know the entire story, only to oneself, a combination of all our parts/roles combined, or if it even exists at all. There are certain things one wants to do in their life, especially considering that some things are only relevant in certain stages of our life and that we only live once (there is no second chance once the stage is passed). Yet the more threads that have been spun, the more difficult it becomes to keep the web together, particularly when the threads aren't all leading in one direction.
Well I'm here, so we might as well get things started. Every time I arrive in the Philippines, I undergo a re-baptismal of sorts. Today, I decided to scout my current area -- by foot, as I usually do. This familiarizes myself with the positioning of roadways and establishments, and awakens my system to the chaos that is normal in the Philippines, though you hit some of this right off the bat when stepping out of Ninoy Aquino International Airport. A kiss from the sun is also a welcome greeting and helps me to re-acclimatize to the tropical weather.
I must admit, I didn't think I could do it again -- return with the same vigor and bold outlook -- as I have done before. The past few years have eroded me, where old ailments returned and to the point that my passion had gradually been traded for complacency. Stagnation and listlessness was taking its toll and I could feel my self slipping away. Fortunately, recent inspiration had lifted me high enough in the past few weeks to embark on a reconstruction, which I have been painstakingly committed to and am slowly but gradually accomplishing.
I had a chance to work on a short Coconuter clip/plug this weekend that was to be aired in a segment on national Philippine television. The plug didn't push through (due to music copyright issues, I am told), so I thought I'd go ahead and post it here instead, so at least it will not go to waste.
I am unraveling and feel as if I am losing my self -- or rather, understanding myself? My resoluteness to progress with a modern life in the United States and embrace all the trappings that come with it is slowly but surely deteriorating. Or by the recent rate, should I say rapidly? I've relinquished my plans for graduate studies a couple of days ago, and now I am not sure how much longer I will be able to tolerate my day job -- or, this culture. That is not to say that there is something wrong with the United States. Quite the contrary, the U.S. is a great country; rather, I believe it is me who has issues. Sometimes I wonder if I might have some kind of psychological complex, or if this is just my true form trying to come out after prolonged suppression.
As I have mentioned in the past, some friends and I have been working on a new startup idea -- PayGuard. Slowly, this seed of ours has been taking shape, but we still need some help to get it sprouted.
It’s Summer time again. 
Sometimes we find ourselves at a standstill, thinking about our next move or dreaming about an ideal one, but really not knowing where life will lead us next. And then we are set in motion once again, towards a direction that may or may not have been part of the plan. With some retrospection, you realize the person you are with now could have been anybody given the number of random and volatile circumstances that could have fluctuated and influenced how the tide would turn. Or you may see that the career you have now was not really formed from intricate design, as a slight breeze towards a different direction or a number of nudges here and there along the way could have resulted in a drastic difference of becoming either an artist, doctor, engineer, or some other profession, if any.
I am pleased to announce that Simon has opened a local flower shop in Solsona, Ilocos Norte. It is his first business, but he is hopeful that it will prove profitable. Simon has named his business after this blog's name, so I hope it will him bring good luck. Though you would think the opposite, as the Coconuter journey has been filled with so much misfortune, I like to think that Coconuter symbolizes more than that -- in the philosophy, experiences, memories, and friendship that have developed along the way.
The boxing world is in outrage due to the unbelievable scores made by the judges in the Pacquiao-Bradley fight. It will go down as one of the most controversial decisions in boxing history. Bradley was awarded the win with scores of 115-113 on both CJ Ross and Duane Ford’s scorecards while Jerry Roth saw it 115-113 in favor of Pacquiao. All three scores are hard to stomach given that the majority of the public viewed it nearly a shutout in Pacquiao's favor, with the exception of one, two, or maybe a maximum of three rounds that could have been awarded to Bradley.
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